Unicorns shitting marshmallows. ♥
Who?

Chloe Chai Xin Yi


Hi, I'm Chloe Chai.
I'm really short.
I look many years younger than I really am.
I'm odd.

My blog is mostly full of nothingness and loads of rants.
It's just a little outlet for letting out my feelings/thoughts.
Please try not to judge me.

Got something to ask me?


Blah blah blah

Links
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2 Erat's Blog!
I Have A Dream FC

Aisyah Ilani
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The past
September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 June 2011 August 2011 September 2011 November 2011 May 2012

Where are you from?

Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Why so boring :(
Hi. I don't really know what to blog about today cause I didn't do anything at all. I sort of fell sick? Lol. My stomach has been such a pain since yesterday. I woke up this morning cause of like this terrible pain in my tummy. I think it's wind? Cause it hurts everytime I move and it's horrible. Boo. But yeah hahaha. Sucks.

I want to try some cakes from Whisk. I always see them tweeting pics of their cakes and I'm just like, I NEED SOME OF THAT. Hahaha. Looks so so good. Mmm. I'm pretty hungry for cakes now. Actually, I always have cravings for cakes, cupcakes and cookies. Oh goodness. This is bad. Hahaha. Very bad!

I tried to start on my SAT earlier. But ohgod. I didn't know where to start. The book is thick as hell and I couldn't really think very well. Hahaha. Maybe I'll start tomorrow? Hahaha. Yeaaaaah. K this is a boring boring post. I'll just go now. :(


CRAPPED @ 8:12 PM

Tuesday, May 8, 2012
I PASSED
OOHH WOAH WOAH. I really did live up to my words about blogging again! Okay, yes, it's only the second day of getting back to it but not bad not bad. Normally I just cbf with everything after a day. HAHAHA.

So, this morning I ACTUALLY WOKE UP to go for my undang test. HUHUHU. Surprised? So am I! And I PASSED. OOOooOoOoooooooO *dances to music* HAHAHA. 46/50. Oh yesss. Not bad eh? Only 4 mistakes HAHAHA. I went to the place looking like utter shit, hair tied and clipped up, glasses on, panda eyes and looking like a zombie, only to remember that I HAD TO TAKE A PICTURE FOR THE L LICENSE THING. HAHAHAHA. At first I was like, OSHIT. But seeing as how it was so early in the morning and I was cranky as hell, I decided not to waste my fucks to give. So, anyways, I went to pee before the test cause if you know me, you know I pee a lot (I don't care if you think that's TMI ^_^Y) and so I went to the toilet and as I closed the door of the cubicle and was about to lock it, I find that they used, A FORK AS A LOCK. It was a SUPER RUSTY AND OLD FORK. I was like, DAFUQ IS THIS SHIT? I didn't want to touch it cause I'm a germaphobe (if you didn't know that about me, you do now). It looked so dirty and rusty and old and dirty. But I had to pee, so when nature calls, I have no choice. I touched the damn fork to lock the cubicle. AND THEN I PEED! YAY! HAHAHA. I washed my hands, unlocked the... fork (?!), and then washed my hands again. It was not fun. Ew. Okay. Ew.

So then I sat for the test, passed, came home, showered, slept, woke up, ate, went to my aunt's house, came home and here I am now. Yep. That's how my day was so far. WOOO.

That's all. I'm eating mangos now. Kbai.


CRAPPED @ 6:25 PM

Monday, May 7, 2012
I'M BACK BITCHEZ.
Hello, blog! It's been awhile. A VERY LONG WHILE. Hohohoho. I thought about getting back into blogging cause, well, it's not like I have been doing much for the past half a year. LOL. And I used to love blogging hahaha, so why not give it a try again!

So for those who don't know, I've been on a very long break ever since IGCSEs ended. I only start college in July. I'll be doing IB (International Baccalaureate) in Taylor's Sri Hartamas. Click that to find out more cause I always get questions about what the course is about. It's not very known in Malaysia, which is a shame. Cause if not I could've saved more time and would've have done it way earlier instead of doing IGCSEs :( But well, too late for that. And besides, I LOVED being in Sri KL. Hahaha. Too many great memories and new friends were made! Also, loads of people ask me why Taylor's Sri Hartamas hahaha. My answer is cause, that's the only Taylor's that offers IB. And like, there are only 11 schools in Malaysia that offers IB. I'm actually REALLY excited to start college hahaha. I barely know anyone there but that's what makes it exciting! I started totally new in Sri KL and now I can start new again! Well, maybe not entirely new cause Alastair will be there with me (Oh God, I'll have to see his face everyday for the next 2 years again. Help me). But yessss. I've been waiting for MONTHS. And I CANNOT wait for college to start!

What have I been doing for the past 7 months? I can summarize everything into one word. NOTHING. Not even kidding. I've been bumming around for the past 7 months. I haven't learnt how to drive, I haven't studied anything, I did not get a job, I have seriously just done nothing. My brain cells are literally rotting away. I get dumber and dumber each day. Also, I have become an even bigger ball of chubbiness. Hahahaha. Yeah, pretty pathetic. I sort of have 2 months left and everyday I'm hoping that time flies by faster! I'm trying to get my days to be more productive cause I know that I'll suffer when college starts if I don't. So I'm gonna learn how to drive, I was thinking of getting a job too, but maybe I won't do that anymore hahaha. I'm still considering it. But yeah. In short, the past 7 months have been completely unproductive, I've been a useless bum and I'm dying to start college. That's all I have to update about the past 7 months of my life. Chloe Chai, bringing the word pathetic to extreme levels. HAHAHA.

PS: I was supposed to go for my undang computer test thing this morning at 8AM. I woke up at 11AM. HAHAHA. YEAH.


okbai


CRAPPED @ 7:03 PM

Sunday, November 6, 2011
everyone just wants someone who won't give up on them no matter what mistake they make.


CRAPPED @ 3:52 PM

Monday, September 26, 2011
Y'know, you're actually pretty cute. But it's sad cause, idk. You're not, hmm, genuine? Idk what it is, but you put on this mask/facade in front of people. You're so different with me, caring and nice. But then again maybe the facade is only with me? But whichever it is, if you were nicer in general and a better person, life really would be so much better for you. Less drama, less hate. Cause you're so much better than all of that. It's sad and a shame really.


CRAPPED @ 7:04 PM

Sunday, September 25, 2011
Why can't I be okay with who I am?


CRAPPED @ 11:39 AM

Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Midnight rants
I have this thing where I don't like to start conversations with people through text/whatsapp/skype or whatever else there is first cause I don't wanna seem annoying. Even if I'm super lonely or whatever, I still hold back from starting a conversation. Always. There's this huge fear I've always had. A fear of losing friends and being alone. And by friends, I mean ANY friend. Be it a close friend or even a hi bye friend. All friends mean a lot to me. They really do. Some people don't know to what extent I care about my friends. Especially for my really close friends. There's almost nothing I wouldn't do for them. And I worry, care and love them unconditionally. However, even so, I never fail to fear the chances of losing them. I hate being alone. I hate just the thought of being alone. I despise it. I loathe it. I'm already an only child as it is. Which is why the fear of losing people frightens me to extreme extents.

If anything, I hate troubling my friends the most. If I find out that I troubled a friend even in the slightest bit, I would start feeling super bad and guilty about it. Even if they say it's alright. I would rather be all depressed and sad alone than bring my friends down with me. I tend to over think A LOT. Like, so much, I tend to assume things and come up with conclusions on my own. Which I know never brings any good. But I still do it cause I'm unable to stop myself from doing so. Which is why, when I know that I've made a friend upset/disappointed/annoyed or whatever, I immediately feel like an enormous pile of ... elephant poo. Then I start thinking about why I can't be a better friend or a better person. In short, I just tend to think very negatively of myself.

Which comes to my other point of me being extremely negative about myself. I actually am very positive about a lot of things in life. Like about situations and outcomes. BUT only when it comes to OTHER people. When it comes to myself on the other hand, pessimism gets the better out of me every single time. I have an extremely negative outlook about myself. I always put myself down. Every day I wonder to myself; Why can't I be pretty? Why can't I have a better figure? Why can't I be tall? Why can't I be smart? Why can't I be a better person? Why can't I be a better friend? Why can't I be a better daughter? Why can't I be more well liked? Why can't I... All these different why can't I questions fill my head every single day. I question myself constantly. I am just completely unable to believe that I am any of those things. Which is why when people compliment me, it is just hard for me to accept them. Because I just, really don't believe them. I just don't see how I could be/am any of those things people called me. But I will start saying thank you and only thank you when people compliment me from now on because I have learnt that many people think that you're just being LOA if you go all, "NOOOOOO". But I really want people to know that whenever I do that, I really really don't intend on being LOA. I just truly find it hard to believe and am truly sorry if you thought I was just being LOA. BUT I always worry that people might also think that I am one of those girls who totally agree that they're pretty and like, enjoy soaking up compliments by just blatantly saying thank you. But well, society is judgemental of everything you do. So in the end, whatever way of responding to compliments still gives society different ways to judge you.

Society is complicated. It expects so many things of people with it's constant judgement, is filled with prejudiced views and misconstrued ideologies and so much more. All in all, life itself is complicating. And also, I have no idea how I jumped from friends to society. It's 3AM now and I should really be asleep. So I'll just stop here cause I'm pretty sure not more than one person or maybe even no one read this whole post. So goodnight, world.


CRAPPED @ 3:07 AM